:lmao:
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to hangemhigh again. :(
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The lawyer says to the wealthy art collector tycoon: "I have some good news and, I have some bad news”
The tycoon replies: "I’ve had an awful day, let's hear the good news first”.
The lawyer says: “Your wife invested $5,000 in two pictures today that she figures are worth a minimum of $10 million”.
The tycoon replies enthusiastically: “Well done, very good news indeed! You've just made my day; now what’s the bad news?”
The lawyer answers: “The pictures are of you banging your secretary”.
I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching
the house 24/7. I've never felt safer and I'm saving $49.95 a month!
^ I like that idea! :lol:
I went to the doctor's office the other day and found out that my new doctor is young, female and drop dead gorgeous.
I was embarrassed, but she said, "Don't worry, I'm a professional, I've seen it all before. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll check it out."
I said, "My wife thinks that my penis tastes funny."